It is early morning, and I'm having a difficult time sleeping. Waking up to cramps in the foot doesn't help. From what I'm guessing, it could be a lack of drinking enough water. Can't go back to sleep, so I thought I would just write. I know I need to get a good night's sleep. This is a period of time when the body begins to heal itself.
I'm wrestling with the idea of my own mortality. Life is so short in retrospect. You never even consider that your life is coming to an end until you develop a terminal disease. Then you begin asking yourself a million questions. Why did this happen? What did I do to deserve this? Haven't I gone through enough trials in my life? Why did this happen now when I was just starting to get my life together? So many questions.
Ultimately, God is the author of our days. I know that going through suffering, trials, and tribulations develops our faith and gives us the strength to overcome the next situation or circumstance. In the development of our faith, God walks with us through the difficulties we face and even sometimes carries us. I am grateful that we never have to walk this journey alone.
We also need to trust God and His Sovereignty. He has given us our family and friends to help us in these difficult times.
It's funny because my son and I were talking, and he wanted to know what my idea of a family was. Something I haven't really experienced in my childhood. Not a healthy one anyway. I looked at family as a unit that supports and cares for one another emotionally and spiritually. We have our biological family, friends we consider family, and our church family. They can encourage and pray for us. They can help take care of us by taking us to doctor's appointments, cooking, or helping to care for us during our recovery.
I am grateful for my church family, who have continued to pray for me during this process. This has been very encouraging for me. I am grateful for God and his providence. God always seems to know what I need and when I need it.
Scarlett
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