An Unclear Future

 

Well, today has been very frustrating.  My surgery has been postponed and I feel as if I am on a roller coaster ride, or the beginning of a nightmare.  

The results of the MRI have lead too more mammograms and ultra sounds.  I was supposed to go in for another biopsy, since the images showed another mass or spots on both breasts.  This has all occurred just one week before I was supposed to go in to have the seed placed.  One week before my surgery.  I couldn't even get an appointment for the biopsy until four weeks after my surgery date.  

My cancer team was able to find another facility for me to have the biopsy done and still have time to continue with the original surgery date. 

The evening prior to going to having the biopsy done, I received a call from the nurse about the possibility of them not being able to do the biopsy. They needed more clarification from my surgeon about the areas needed to be biopsied.  There were three areas on the left breast and one on the right.  They were hoping to get in touch with the surgeon before I arrived the next morning.  Since, we had not received a phone call we got ready and headed for the facility, which was a forty-five minute drive.

I checked in and waited.  Surprised, I was not ask for any information, asked to fill out any paperwork or prepay for services.  I was eventually called and taken to an office in the back.  This is where I was told they were not able to contact the doctor and would not be able to proceed with the procedure.

 Unfortunately, the radiologist did not feel comfortable with the results or conclusions of the radiologist of the original facility and needed a third opinion before proceeding with the biopsy.  It would be great if the results of the original were incorrect, right.  Now I need to wait to see what needs to be done next.  Do I still need the biopsy?  Should I just go with the mastectomy?  The path at this point is not very clear.  This was supposed to be a simple procedure.  Cut and dry...

After the consultation with the doctors. They suggested doing a MRI Biopsy. So they had to move the date of my surgery so they could do a MRI Biopsy.  Unfortunately, the surgery date would need to be moved again.  The only date available for the MRI Biopsy happened to be on the date of my next surgery.  I really don't want to have to postpone the surgery again.  The scheduler did not know how to even schedule the appointment and was concerned about them cancelling the MRI Biopsy again because the scheduling was not correct.  Plus, this procedure was going to take two days.  I called my doctors office to explain what was happening and was not able to talk with anyone.  Finally, the scheduler from my doctors office called me back and told me she would let me know more information Monday morning. Monday morning came and went, no response.  I called again and no response.  

Frustrated I am, yes indeed.

It is difficult to remain patient and calm, since I don't know if the cancer is even spreading or has spread.  Is this a super fast moving cancer?

Right now, I feel scared and unsure of the future.  I feel alone even though I know I am not walking through this alone.  My husband has been extremely supportive in every way imaginable.  I also know that God is working in this situation.

Now I have two appointments scheduled with two different facilities.  My life feels like its up in the air right now.

Scarlett